How to do what I want to do.
Sometimes, there’s a part of my brain that offers me a lot of unsolicited advice. And it’s not good advice, either. It buys into external influence that tells me what I should do, instead of inquiring into what I want to do. It tells me what’s ‘best’ for me based on societal and cultural constraints. It cares what other people think.
It’s easy to get derailed from my true path when that part of my brain becomes active. It has a loud voice. It tells me what’s ‘best’ for me in order to help me conform, which is meant to protect me from criticism, ostracism, and hurt. It convinces me that the well-meaning advice I get from friends and family is correct, and these opinions crowd out what my heart has to say.
This week, I am performing an exercise in shutting out the external noise, in order to hear my true self. This is an ongoing exercise, part of the journey of my life. Every once in awhile, I realize I have not been vigilant in putting my own needs first. When this happens, I always take some time to retreat, reset and rebalance.
Here’s how I’ll do it this time.
I have returned to my 6 part morning ritual; meditation, affirmations, visualization, reading to learn, writing and walking. (This is adapted from Hal Elrod’s book; The Miracle Morning) This ritual is a time for extreme self care for me. The whole routine is designed for me to listen to my own voice, speak my truth, and hear where I want my life to go.
I am refusing to drown myself out with any type of audio. (If you know me, you know I am addicted to noise. I am uncomfortable with silence. I am always playing CBC in my house, music in the car, and audio books whenever I walk anywhere.) So this week, I am giving myself the quiet that will permit my heart to sing.
I am not going to do anything for anyone else this week. No people pleasing. I’m not doing anything that I think someone else wants me to do. I am mindfully choosing only activities that I feel like doing. I don’t mean I’m about to hop on a plane to a tropical destination (because, yes, I always feel like doing that!) I mean, of the regular, daily things I usually do, what are my priorities? What am I doing because I want to, not because I feel like I have to? What makes my happy, brings me joy, feels fulfilling or reduces stress? And what could I let fall away? I am excited to know this answer!
I have a notebook handy and I’m waiting for the cues from my gut, my intuition. I’m turning off that noisy, impressionable part of my brain this week, to focus on me. It’s time to love me fiercely.
Thanks for sharing in my journey. I am honoured to have you know it. #thisisme